What If Bob Ross Tattooed?!

World Peace through Soccer

Fresh back from new ink, I had some interesting conversations with the artist as he worked on my ink.

In case it isn't clear, this is called "World Peace though Soccer" and it is so named after a T-Shirt that I had for a long time in my Twenties.  It featured three images and was not nearly as wicked cool as this ink.

Soccer has been a large part of my life from the tender age of nine when I strapped on my first cleats.  My parents wouldn't let me play football, but given that I probably weighed 60 pounds, it is no wonder.  Sparked by this first year, I began a lifelong journey that has further framed a large part of my life.

My dad and sister began playing shortly after my first season and my dad began refereeing at the same time.  He worked his way to becoming an 'A' referee in the area where we lived.  For the layman, this meant that he could referee all the way up to Division III collegiate games.  Were it not for his late start, he could have gone much farther.  Though he had aspirations for me to become a referee, my nature is to pick sides and that isn't great for an impartial judge.I had a glorious season as an assistant coach at a church school nearby our house.  When I became a father, I was further rewarded with coaching my sons along with some other great kids.

I have played outdoors, indoors, men's league, and coed. I have had indescribable joy sharing professional games with my dad as well as with my wife.  I have watched World Cup qualifying matches and World Cup games on the television.  I have watched the American Women win a world cup.  I have watched the American Men come closer each year to being taken seriously. My love of the game has grown over the last 37 years. My hope is to one day see a World Cup Final... in person.

Interesting Conversation with PJ : If Bob Ross was a Tattoo Artist

Now we just need a big ole dead
tree right in the middle!

After telling PJ that one of the evenings this week, my DVR and television choices had been spent watching back to back episodes on New York Ink, which we agreed was like Survivor: Tattoo meets Jersey Shore, followed by back to back episodes of The Joy of Painting.  Eclectic choices for sure, but mostly art related.  We then began to ponder what Bob Ross would have been like all inked up and doing tattoos in 30 minutes.

It's clear that Bob was stuck on a limited pallet, like his clothes were stuck on the seventies. His Pthalo Blue would war against the so much stronger Prussian Blue. Choices would be tough between (Dick) Van Dyke Brown and Dark Sienna.

One of the things about Bob has always been his deep soft voice, but that simply doesn't fit a tattoo artist. It would obviously still be there, but more gravelly, like James Hetfield, the Garage Days years. 

Welcome to The Joy of Tattooing, I could care less that you're watching or not. Today, we'll be inking a Happy Little Skull. Maybe we'll have a snake crawling out of the eye socket, I don't know. You know me, I gotta put in a big ole snake.

When you're inking the swastika, make sure you use the criss-cross strokes. 

Ok, here's your bravery test, there's your snake, crawling out of the left socket. Maybe in our world, he's got a friend, even snakes gotta have friends. Yep, there he is coming out of the ear hole. We don't know where he goes, we don't really care. Gotta have snakes, they cover up a multitude of sins, oh who am I kidding they are the sins.

Today we're going to add a little devil tramp stamp on a 50 year old 20 year old wannabe. We'll get to use a lot of Alizarin Crimson even though it is very strong. Little minions, got a have a lot of them little doers around a devil. Just a happy little devil floating around above her whale tail. Yep, just like 'at. Don't forget to chuckle all evil like, you gotta make the little evil laughter or it just doesn't work.

Tomorrow, we ink up a big ole mountain of a trucker with a big ole Jesus. He's gonna look like me, with less Afro. Ha, even if the hair is a little big, we can fluff it. He might kick my lanky ass, but remember that I might have a happy accident make no mistake.

 

 I've decided that Tattooing should be like Amway. I found my artist from a co-worker's girlfriend.  Should she get a taste of the Tattoo fee in the form of a "finder's fee?" And now, when I in turn send work to that artist, I should get a "finder's fee" which of course I need to share with my upstream "finder."  Seems logical, yes?

 If you're in Baltimore area, look for PJ at Art With A Pulse in Glen Burnie. 410.766.4255 

Why wouldn't I put this into the Starting Lineup for Friday's Dude Write?