Conversation with my wife and son (Teenwolf) the other day after returning from a funeral of the mom of an old friend :
Me: I don't like dead bodies. I certainly don't want to be buried when I die. I have nightmares about being buried alive.
TeenWolf: But you'll be dead.
Me: I also won't be here, but no burial.
Teenwolf: So you want the big oven?
Mrs. Mynd: Don't worry, we aren't putting him on the mantel in a pot.
Me: Yeah, I don't want an urn. Maybe just a coffee can. When you go someplace cool, you can grab a pill bottle of my ashes and scatter them wherever you go.
Mrs. Mynd: I'm not scooping you into pill bottles, so you better make the arrangements to include pre-filling the bottles.
I wonder if such arrangements can even be made? What is the weirdest non-celebrity death arrangement request? In talking with Jay of Jay's Ramblings this weekend, the perfect solution has been determined...
Each canister will be filled with a small amount of ashes.
Conveniently marked with an "S" in case you forget who is in there... (the P could be short for so many things and the people who never really liked me, but faked it well enough to get an invitation to the memorial service could get those)
So, are you going some place nice that you're sure I would have enjoyed? Sprinkle.
A little in the Ocean, I loved the Ocean. How about the Mountains, sure! Sprinkle. Sprinkle.
Stuck for something to do with me, just set me on the table in a restaurant... I loved a good practical joke.
And for those in the category of haters, dump me down the toilet... Nemo taught us that all water leads to the ocean. Perhaps you want to take me out to the landfill and toss me in the air for skeet practice, do it... I loved gun sports.
The worst thing you could do to me is set me on the mantle...
And, no, I'm not dying... any faster than the rest of you anyway.